Today I put on the lab coat and nerdy glasses.
I saw on the Today Show this morning that Al Roker was demonstrating that you can balance an egg on end today, since it’s the Vernal Equinox.
Yeah.
Just in case you were uninformed about the truth of this, let me just set the record straight: you can do this ANY DAY OF THE YEAR.
There’s nothing special about the Vernal Equinox as far as egg-balancing is concerned.
Thank you for your time.
And now, back to the usual twaddle.
Following are some excerpts from my own mother’s writings about her life as a single mother in the suburbs of Sacramento, California dealing with three boys: Nine, Eight and Three. The three-year-old she refers to so often is me.
If blogging were around in 1967, she would have had one. As it is, these are transcribed from hand-typed pages, yellowed and tattered from age.
Tuesday, February 7
Three year old running around singing the song of the camp fire girls. SING WO-HE-LO, SING WO-HE-LO… etc. Then he comments on how he wants to be a Campfire Girl – the fact that he is already aimed on the pathway to boyhood doesn’t seem to deter him. Then it dawns on me – it’s the mints. The campfire mints that we bought and which are rationed out in all too small amounts to suit his greedy little sweet-tooth. I suppose he thinks that if he were a Campfire Girl he would be in on the ground floor, so to speak, and get his little hands on all the mints he wanted. So after lunch I bribe him with one to go outside so that I may write for a few minutes.
(I remember a lot of instances from my childhood of being bribed to go outside.)
Thursday, February 9
Unfortunately, I have passed the point of clear thinking for the day, if I ever came to it, I’m not to sure by now. My mind has mostly been on how unbelievably cold a house can get when it is permeated by this foggy drizzle through every pore.
This evening the nine-year-old was showing his two brothers how people dance when they go out on dates. It got pretty funny when he was trying to put his arm around the small one’s waist and waltz around. Then the eight-year-old was showing us a folk dance that he learned in school which involves clapping hands over head. A three-year-old’s arms are not yet long enough to meet over his head and it was funny to see him laughing like a fool and clonking himself in the head trying to clap his hands.
Friday, February 10
Am still trying to recover from the shock of seeing that strange, unfamiliar glow in the sky. Felt like a mole who has just popped his head out from the underground for the first time. However, this phenomena brought with it some assorted ills. For instance, the crumbs on my kitchen floor not only stood out in bold relief, but today they cast shadows which got longer as the day grew shorter. Growing weary of watching this unusual sight, I got out the vacuum, which hasn’t been at all well lately, and after playing shuffleboard for awhile it begrudgingly picked some of the stuff up.
Tuesday, February 14
Today will reign supreme in my mind as one of the worst in the history of mankind, at least in our house. Starting with a fruitless search for a bunch of misplaced valentines with a few assorted other tragedies at the same time. Actually, the simple act of getting up in the morning is an over-whelming crisis to me and usually if I do that with relative lack of discomfort I feel pleased.
When I went out to the garage, the car gave a lurch forward and barged into the back of our little sailboat. I suppose I would have been grateful for the fact that it didn’t reward me by plummeting down right on the hood.
The ordeal at nursery school doesn’t bear repeating, so I won’t. Back home to bake cupcakes for the Cubscouts and cherry tarts as a present for Valentine’s day. In between phone calls and tearing out my hair, I managed to get little else done.
(I’m still curious as to what happened at nursery school. I always loved it when my own mom was there as a volunteer, even though I accidentally pelted her with a rock once. I still feel bad about that, by the way.)
Sunday, February 17th
I was talking with the neighbors, and one of them asked me if I’d ever used one of those bombs to clean my oven. I told her no, I hadn’t, but I was seriously considering using a hand grenade.
(This is just a sample of several stacks of writings my mother did. I think, like me, writing was her catharsis – a means to release the stress of parenthood. Particularly parenting a very busy set of boys. Not only do I see where Michael gets his mischievous nature, but I see where I get my bizarre sense of humor.)
Unreserved confession: I stole this idea from OhCaptain unabashedly.
He has a “wordle” snapshot of his blog, and I thought it was so cool I’d do one of mine.
This thing picks the words it finds the most and makes them the biggest in the picture.
Being such a curmudgeon, I figured the words it would show most would be “grumpy,” “gripe,” “yell,” and “angry.”
Instead, it’s positive words that show up most prominently. Maybe I’m not as grouchy as I thought I was.
Posted in Blog
I’m buried in actual work today. But I had to put something up here so you didn’t miss me.
Here it is:
“Goofy Grape”
“Lefty Lemon”
“Choo-choo Cherry”
Name another one.
And, if you can, tell me what they are and why they’re relatively unknown now.
No giveaway here, sorry, but it’s fun anyway.
Tyler over at Building Camelot has stealthily bestowed upon me the Charming Blog Award, an honor of considerable merit.
As such I heartily accept the challenge of passing this award on to eight other bloggers whose friendship and camaraderie I have enjoyed greatly.
Furthermore, I also proffer forth the following words that are to travel with the award and give you an idea of its meaning:
“These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers! Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.”
Thus, I pass along this award to:
They all deserve a click.
Posted in Blog
Today we proclaim a monumental honor for Being Michael’s Daddy!
On Teens Today is a modern-day perspective on teens by teens, moderated by Vanessa Van Petten, whose mission is providing a venue where teen writers can “tell parents what they wish their own parents knew (and didn’t know).”
We’ve been voted as one of the 50 Best Dad Blogs. We’re up amongst the best of the best out there, which is a very cool thing for this little blog.
As you’re well aware, Being Michael’s Daddy tends to focus on the minutiae of daily life as a 45-ish father of teenagers and an unexpected and tireless child; we shy away from such weighty matters as politics, environmental concerns, top ten lists and celebrity anxiety. And as for touching, reflective moments, I believe there might have been two last year.
But amongst the leavings and the pith lying upon the floor here, the occasional kernel of valuable parenting material may be discovered.
Evidently Vanessa and her staff have found enough nuggets here to warrant inclusion in this auspicious list. Yes, we do have tips here. We do have advice here. And Michael is rather adorable. Even his sisters think so (when he’s not standing in the way of the TV).
So today, we proudly display our “Voted Best Dad Blog” badge.
Thank you, On Teens Today!
Over the past couple of years, I’ve gotten thousands of comments; which, when you consider the fact that I have 42 readers, is pretty amazing. But this is the internet! Anything’s possible! No, wait… that’s Disneyland.
But as I was saying, I have gotten countless comments from people clamoring for something more. Something better. Something… bolder!.
Comments like this:
Tom: I’m bored. Your site is boring. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Or this:
Tom, can you spruce the site up a bit? It’s boring.
Then there’s this one:
Tom, you have to do something about that background. It’s like being smothered with faded clown pajamas and I’m sick to death of looking at it.
And this:
Whoops, sorry. Didn’t mean to comment here. I thought I was over at BusyDad.
Ha, ha! The comments I get! I can scarcely keep up with all them, as they come flooding in here every day! It’s a veritable madhouse, I tell you.
But all seriousness aside, it’s high time for a change. Michael has matured a great dealgrown some, and he’s in to new and more destructive bigger mischief greater things. Since this blog started way back in ‘ought six, Michael has gone from crib to bed, from diapers to big boy briefs, and from eating with his fingers to… well, I guess he still does that. But anyway, he’s taller. And he talks more. And he asks questions. Oh, so many questions! Question after question after question. Questions about things only he knows the answer to. Questions that have no logical answer. Questions about questions. Great merciful heavens, the questions. Questions ad nauseum, ad infinitum, et in saecula saeculorum…
Sorry, where was I?
Oh yes.
Without further ado, let me introduce to you the new, improved, certified sustainable, halogen-free and rainforest friendly Being Michael’s Daddy Blog!
Made from 100% recycled pixels, this dazzling new page springs forth from the inspiration of Michael’s mommy and by the paint.net expertise of the author to create an image that truly captures our family’s essence. Allow me to point out a few details.
Michael’s mommy stands next to one sister, while daddy is with two others. These are the daughters we each brought with us to the marriage. Michael stands alone as the new addition, in the center of it all, grinning with pride in labeling this new blended family as his own.
Michael comes from brown eyed, brown haired stock, yet he defied odds with his blue eyes and red hair, making him unique amongst us.
We don’t have a tree house. I tried to build one, but that didn’t work out so good. It sure would be cool to have one like the one up there, though. Minus the spider.
Note the spider. Spiders play a recurrent role in our life, despite our best efforts. I’m finding myself becoming more and more at peace with this fact (itself a disturbing trend).
So there you go. Same old drivel, sparkling new package. Just like Coke Classic. Only less satisfying and less profitable.
What do you think? Leave me a comment. Yes, I’m begging.
Posted in Blog
…while I do a little update here. Hopefully it won’t take long.
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Posted in Blog
Jeremy over at Discovering Dad put up a post of mine covering the toughest thing I’ve had to do as a dad. It’s not a pretty story. Drop on by his site and take a look.
I hope that my experience can make a difference for someone else.
Posted in Blog, guest post
Today, we at Being Michael’s Daddy are honored to be featured in the Spotlight On Dads series over at Discovering Dad.
Go take a look! For the first and only time, you’ll get a chance to see Michael’s Mommy and his sisters. You can’t pass up that opportunity!
While you’re there, take a read at the other things going on there at Jeremy’s site.
See you there!
Posted in Blog, guest post