Michael isn’t much of a reader yet. Years ago, his mom and I held out high hopes. At the age of two he knew all of his letters and their sounds, and was spelling out words he saw: EXIT, STOP, OFF, WALK, etc. We assumed he was going be reading Dostoevsky and Joyce in no [...]

Tom yawns and he sets the last button on his jammies. He stretches and climbs aboard the Sleepytime Express, ready for a good night’s trip through Slumbertown. “Good evening, sir,” the driver says. “Usual stop? 4:30 AM?” “Not this time, Joe! It’s Saturday! I’ll be going straight on through town,” Tom says with a sleepy [...]

(We’re on our way to church camp. Michael is excited.) Michael: “Daddy? Why is the road blocked over there? What are those cones? They’re working on those rocks, aren’t they? There are a lot of rocks. They’ll break your tires if you drove over them whoa! That’s a twirly sprinkler! Have you ever seen a [...]

Michael has a lot of little characteristic behaviors that tend to belie his actual age. One of them is his construction of imponderable phrases: “How come the ice cream trucks are all the time?” (translation: “I’ve seen over four ice cream trucks pass today. That seems excessive.”) or “I need to save my laughs, because [...]

Sunday was a heck of a day. Not sure what his deal was, but Michael was in rare form, breaking previous records of impishness-per-minute. I was very much looking forward to my favorite part of the day, the time when I can tuck Michael in bed and basically be done with him. Bedtime rolled around [...]

Michael, holding plum between thumb and forefinger, for me to see: “Mommy and Daddy? Can I eat this?” Mommy: “You need to wash that off first.” Michael: “Where can I wash it?” Daddy: “Anywhere you can find running water.” Michael trots to the bathroom and rinses plum off under faucet, then saunters back, nibbling on [...]

There are times when I think maybe Michael might be an alien. Sometimes I just can’t figure him out; what his motivations are, what his thought processes are, where his road is taking him. By this, I mean that he often does and says things that I simply cannot reason out. A few weekends ago [...]

Michael is now employing the “truth hurts so I’ll lie” method to handling new and different foods. He says “I love it,” meaning “that was vile, but I get in trouble for being brutally honest about how disgusting certain foods are so I’ll say what I think you want to hear so you’ll leave me [...]

My wife and I have noticed recently that Michael has taken to questioning our driving abilities. Just about anywhere we go, seconds after we’ve left our neighborhood, Michael will begin loudly casting doubts upon our course: “Are you sure you know where you’re going?” “I don’t think this is the right way.” “We’re getting lost.” [...]

It’s morning, and Michael is once again in mommy & daddy’s room making sure we don’t do anything crazy like sleep past 6:00 AM. He’s chattering at his mom as she quietly puts together his outfit for the day, all the while giving ear to the morning news in hopes of hearing a positive weather [...]